The list, part one

A look at this year's top local releases

by John O'Neill

Here 'tis, boys and girls. Part one of the Worcester Phoenix Mother of All Music Lists for your bathroom reading delight/dismay. Who knows, if this Y2K disaster has panned out and the world goes deep south, you just might come over to my cave to say thanks for the toilet paper! We've kept it mostly local this time out (we fully expect some pouting on this one), though we also tacked on some listening items for your pleasure. Next week, expect the top 100 bands, some obscurities, and at least one reason why Billy Joel is the worst.

Top Fifty All-Worm Greatest Rock and Roll Combos

1. Odds 26. Nite Riders

2. Time Beings 27. Halobox

3. Bugs 28. Vejtabils

4. Beep Beep and the Roadrunners 29. Surreal McCoys

5. Actions 30. Patience

6. Curtain Society 31. Westies

7. Belmondos 32. Pathetics

8. Joneses 33. Upsidedown Cross

9. Hip Civilians 34. Puddle

10. Huck 35. White Knuckle Sobriety

11. Bob Jordan 36. Preston Wayne Four

12. Little Big Wheel 37. Chillum

13. Creatures of Habit 38. Prefab Messiahs

14. Life Goes Wrong 39. Prizefighter

15. Thinner/Popskull 40. Cast Iron Hike

16. Resistance 41. Lee Totten

17. Childhood 42. Stags

18. Dimwit 43. Missionarys

19. Commandos 44. Aggressions

20. Clutch Grabwell 45. Alex and the Droogs

21. Performers 46. Seven Hill Psychos

22. Bonehead 47. Gas, Food, Lodging

23. Crazy Jack and the Heart Attacks 48. Public Works

24. Dialtones 49. Continental Divide

25. Pale Nephews 50. The Clock

Top of the local pops albums and such of the '90s

(sorry, no demo tapes)

1. Curtain Society -- Life is Long Still (Bedazzled)

2. Thinner -- Sonic Dinner (Ruggy)

3. Huck -- Honey Wagon (Orcaphat)

4. Puddle -- And They All Began with A . . . (Apostrophe)

5. Time Beings -- It's About Time (BFD)

6. Little Big Wheel -- Home (indie)

7. White Knuckle Sobriety --Fat End First (ECAE)

8. Life Goes Wrong -- You're Soaking in It (DBS Godman)

9. Bob Jordan -- Four Corners (indie)

10. Upsidedown Cross -- Witchcraft (Final Injection)

Okay, favorite demo tapes of the '90s

1. Roy Hinkley Trio -- Jesus Ray

2. Halobox -- demo

3. The Deal -- Four by Three

4. Stags -- Live at Ralph's

5. Dimwit -- demo

Best-ever local songs (that were actually released --

not just a live thing)

1. "Pretty Girl" -- Bugs

2. "True Love Knows" -- Beep Beep and the Roadrunners

3. "Why Don't You Love Me" -- Time Beings

4. "Two Wonderful Stars" -- Curtain Society

5. "Shooting Holes" -- Little Big Wheel

6. "You Ain't My Mama" -- Crazy Jack & the Heart Attacks

7. "Baby" -- Joneses

8. "Train Rolled" -- Halobox

9. "Wind It Out" -- Thinner

10. "Wild Weekend" -- Blue Moon Band (Creatures of Habit)

Top 20 Beantowners ever

1. Real Kids 11. Willie Alexander

2. Lyres 12. Hopelessly Obscure

3. DMZ 13. Moulty and the Barbarians

4. Barry and the Remains 14. Del Fuegos

5. Barrance Whitfield and the Savages 15. Galaxy 500

6. Teddy and the Pandas 16. Outlets

7. Mission of Burma 17. Neighborhoods

8. Modern Lovers 18. Dumptruck

9. Gigolo Aunts 19. Prime Movers

10. Reddy Teddy 20. Titanics

Top 10 scenesters-deluxe (both cool and unusual)

1. Captain P.J.

2. Pat Dunn

3. Butch

4. Artie Sneiderman

5. M.O. (Mark Owen)

6. Rev. Joe Longone

7. Deb Beaudry

8. Chris Manzello

9. Cathy Olson

10. L.B. Worm

A dozen discs for '99 you don't own but should (including retrospectives, etc.)

1. Gigolo Aunts -- Minor Chords and Major Themes (E Plurbus Unum). Maybe the best power-pop album of the past five years, and certainly a milestone for the genre. Nothing new, of course, but Chords is a monster top to bottom and twice as beautiful.

2. Lynn Miles -- Night in a Strange Town (Philo). Our favorite of the new singer/songwriters, Miles dwarfs most in the contemporary, Lilith department, which is why they haven't asked her to play. And she can write a song like nobody's business. So if you're lookin' for heartbreak, Lynn is your gal.

3. Thinner --Sonic Dinner (ECAE). Local boys make good on their second disc. Big sound, fat hooks, ace production, and good songs. What are you waitin' for? Go git it.

4. Forty-Fives -- Get It Together (Ng). Out of nowhere (actually Virginia, which is kinda like nowhere) comes one of the grittiest, punkiest, most rockin' albums in recent memory. They're also soulful as all get out, and genetically encoded to kick ass live.

5. Tom Russell -- The Man from God Knows Where (Hightone). Who'da thunk a "folk opera" (two words that sound crappy enough alone) could sound so good? Russell is one of the most underrated writers and well-worth spending 15 bucks on.

6. Afghan Whigs -- 1965 (Columbia). Lots of pre-hype and mediocre sales again for Greg Dulli and his boys. No matter; they're still one of the elite straight-up rock bands of the '90s, and 1965 is another addition to an already impressive and powerful catalogue.

7. Teddy Morgan and the Pistolas -- Lost Loves & Highways (Hightone). This one snuck across the desk and bit us on the ear. It has some lovely throwbacks to an earlier day when popular country music didn't suck, and Teddy plays a fairly mean guitar. Rootsy, gutsy, and beautifully written, Lost Loves is stellar.

8. Spade Cooley -- Shame on You (Bloodshot). He made Bob Willis and Bill Monroe look like complete pussies. Then he stomped his wife to death and went to jail for life. Let that be a lesson to you. Binge drinking, a bad temper, and making Bill Monroe look bad don't mix.

9. Garrison -- The Bend Before the Break (Revelation). They say it's "heavy melodic," but it sounds like emocore to us! Either way, it's a lovely intro to a one of those so-called up-and-coming bands whom you actually wouldn't mind seeing go places. Plus, they have Worcester roots.

10. Remains -- Remains (Sundazed). Long out-of-print and quite costly to obtain previously, Remains has been re-released thanks to Sundazed Records, which did the world a big favor for delivering this one with bonus cuts. One listen and you'll understand why the Beatles pegged these cats to open their last American tour.

11. Supersuckers -- The Evil Powers of Rock `N Roll (Koch). The last great album of the '90s compliments of the last great band of the '90s. Take two parts punk thrash, a healthy dose of country trash, a dash of not-so-heavy metal, a pinch of nothing-sacred attitude, and a healthy hit off the spliff, and you got it. "My Kickass Life," indeed.

12. Real Kids -- No Place Fast (Norton). Their second (and final) studio disc is finally back in print along with demo songs for Bomp! Records by John Felice's next project, the Taxi Boys (who included Oxford's Scott Parmenter). A must-hear by Boston's best-ever outfit.

The so-weird/rotten-that-you-gotta-own-it hall of fame

1. Shaggs -- Philosophy of the World (Rounder). Three teenage chicks, two chords, and dad's money go to the recording studio. Out of tune, out of time, and brilliantly moronic, this disc is unique because the Shaggs may be the only band to never have had an outside influence.

2. Menster Phips and the Phipsters -- Phip City! (Telstar). Recorded in a suburban cellar (by suburban teens, of course) to a phony radio broadcast, the Phipsters are 100 percent rock and roll played by three percent musicians. Your eyes may actually mist up after hearing the immortal "Daddy Wants a Cold Beer."

3. Tremble -- Deprived of Silence (ECAE). More like deprived of talent. Without a second thought, we say this is the worst-ever local album, yet we've come to realize it as one of our all-time favorites anyhow! We wish we had more copies to pass out to folks.

4. Wesley Willis -- Greatest Hits Vol II (Alternative Tentacles). Love him or hate him, the man has a certain flair for words, especially if you're a fan of "asshole." Wesley also digs riding buses, getting tossed out of places, and singing odes to bands who float his boat.

5. Winterboy -- Volcano (indie). The most pompous, arrogant, and lousy lyrics ever set to tunes. We wish we could write it off as ill-conceived, but Winter's ego won't let us. Our review was received so poorly by the "poet" he's since boycotted both the Phoenix and Worcester! No need for thanks.

6. Hasil Adkins -- Out to Hunch (Norton). The original rock-and-roll-wild man, Adkins is like Jerry-Lee-on-Thorazine- meets-Elvis-sitting-on-a-railroad-spike. He's also a one-man band who has a tough time playing his guitar in tune or keeping a steady beat on his kick drum. It don't matter, he's still one of the greatest ever to shriek a tune.