** SPAWN: THE ALBUM

(Immoral/Epic)

Chances are, metal kids aren't gonna listen to the full meandering washout version of "Trip like I Do" that appears on Crystal Method's Vegas (Outpost), right? But how about a simplified radio edit with guitars and vocal harmonies starring former members of Nine Inch Nails (i.e., Filter)? One problem: distinguishing headbangers won't be fooled by anything that blatantly tossed off. If this album had been anything other than a vanity project, more tracks might have sounded like DJ Spooky's gravity-defying remix of the Metallica chestnut "For Whom the Bell Tolls" -- completely dismantled, time signatures juggled, stripped to bare parts, distorted beyond recognition. But most of the rest of this soundtrack breaks down along three lines: second-run industrialists with better programmers/drum machines (Stabbing Westward with Wink, Marilyn Manson with Sneaker Pimps); self-indulgent guitarists and "poets" who leave their electronic partners holding the bag (Rollins with Goldie, guitarist-as-DJ Tom Morello with Prodigy); and just plain drivel (even the Dust Brothers can't make Korn sound funky). The only thing that sounds relevant is Atari Teenage Riot's stint with Slayer -- slightly redundant, since ATR sample those guys anyway.

-- Carly Carioli