TOMCATS

Tom Meek

The tags "sexist" and "misogynistic" might prove too slight for Gregory Poirier's American Pie wanna-be, which boasts, "The three words a woman wants to hear most are . . . suck my cock." Sure, the T&A show is eye-popping, and the sophomoric humor is ostensibly tongue-in-cheek, but what kind of message does it send when every female is a scantily clad lascivious bombshell without a brain cell in her head? Not to mention that Politically Incorrect talk-show host Bill Maher lends his mug as a casino manager who relishes the "collections" aspect of his job.

Jerry O'Connell, the chubby kid in Stand by Me and the prick in Body Shots, is surprisingly adept doing the goofball-comedy shtick as Michael, one of two surviving bachelors from a septet of buddies who made a "last unmarried man" bet years ago. Now the well-invested pot stands at nearly a half-million. Michael needs the money to pay a gambling debt, but Kyle (a snaky Jake Busey), the über-jerk whose mission it is to boink every woman in the world, stands in his way. All Michael can do is find Natalie (Pie alum Shannon Elizabeth), the one woman Kyle had feelings for, and hope she can rekindle that old magic and spark matrimony. Of course it's Michael who falls for Natalie, but who can worry about that when there's a rogue testicle bouncing around a hospital cafeteria?