[Sidebar] The Worcester Phoenix
December 4 - 11, 1998

[Features]

Shopping

Best gourmet food store

A step inside Ed Hyder's Mediterranean Market Place, an innocuous-looking former-firehouse shop on Pleasant Street, reveals not rusting fire engines or tattered rolls of hose but a 2000-plus item stockpile of ethnic and gourmet food that borders on the sublime. The market concentrates on Central Mediterranean foods, but Indian, British, French, Asian, Arabic, and Italian products are all represented. There's even a special section for Louisiana hot sauces -- one of our favorites: "Bottled Hell." Hyder himself boasts of having one of the area's largest selections of premium coffees, teas, and spices; and he also carries some of the best imported and domestic cheeses. Produce, nuts, breads, beer and wine, exotic oils, fine chocolate, and specialty meats make up the rest. All well and good, but in this age of sour-pussed, gum-crackin' checkout clerks, the best reason to visit Hyder's market is the man himself. Hyder greets every customer with the same level of consideration and respect. He can answer any question you might have about his products and, if necessary, in one of several languages. Although this is Hyder's fourth location in his 23 years of doing business, his business philosophy has remained unchanged. Hyder's food is of gourmet quality, but his prices remain reasonable; the intention being to serve his broad ethnic clientele not as a once-a-month or holiday stop but as their regular marketplace.

Ed Hyder's Mediterranean Market Place, 408 Pleasant Street, Worcester, 755-0258

Best ear wax

This one was a no-brainer. Ever since the legendary Mars Records packed up shop and kited off to major success in Boston, Worcester has lacked a great spot for vinyl records. Luckily, vinyl, once an endangered species, has made a huge comeback due to big bands like Pearl Jam who were seeking the same "credibility" as indie bands who had continued making albums and 45s all along. Newbury Comics takes the honors for the top spot to get your wax fix. A spin through the bin and you'll find albums by the Beastie Boys, Miles Davis, the Mummies, John Coltrane; there are soundtracks, including the Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, and various electronica mixes. The 45 selection is even more eclectic, and, in a nod to good neighbor relations, local bands are well represented in both the record and disc section. A quick check found releases from locals Puddle, Cast Iron Hike, Woodgrain Theory, Thinner, Gangsta Bitch Barbie, Guerrero, Vinegar Tom, and Clutch Grabwell, among many others. There is no competition when it comes to selection and price -- if only they'd expand and carry used stuff, we'd never have a reason to shop anywhere else.

Newbury Comics, 551 Boston-Worcester Turnpike (Rt. 9), Shrewsbury, 845-3391

Best stalking stuffer

Your significant other has told you to never call again, and it's obvious that there's someone else in the picture. A relationship lasting one year, two months, four days, (counting the last three-and-a-half weeks of being told to drop dead) down the drain. What to do? If you really want that special someone back, nothing says lovin' quite like 24-hour secret surveillance. (That way you'll be all caught up when you finally see the error of his or her ways.) And you'll want to dress the part, which is where Berger's Army & Navy store comes in. You can be outfitted in fatigues, a black army sweater, pants, and watchcap for night-stalking for a very reasonable price. Berger's also has lots of great stuff for the well-balanced. A wool overcoat can go for as little as forty dollars, and a leather biker jacket will only set you back $165. There's also a full line of Chuck Taylor canvas kicks at a decent price, combat boots, heavy-flannel shirts, wool socks, and suspenders. Of course, there's a ton of neato things like a Swedish army helmet and an Israeli gas mask (both steals at twenty beans) and a standard-issue shaving kit, map case, official foot powder, and various patches and badges. Most so-called Army/Navy stores have been inundated with other "fashionable" clothing, but Berger's is still the real deal.

Berger's Army & Navy, 709 Main Street, Worcester, 753-2684

Best opportunity to climb the ladder

Many a do-it-yourselfer has felt the warm satisfaction that arises from fixing that leaky dishwasher or busted doorknob without the wallet-gouging expense of a professional. Alas, all but a lucky few have dealt with the dark side of home repair. You know, you've got the hood up on the Dodge; it's a sunny afternoon, all you've got to do is get this nut off and . . . hmmm. That ratchet's a bit off. Let's see. Aaagh! I've got every single size ratchet, except the one I need. God, why hast thou forsaken me? Sound familiar? Elmwood Adams Hardware in downtown Worcester has been helping consumers avoid that since 1782. Its air of longevity can be extended to its employees: store manager Vic Durocher started at the business right out of college and has been there for 33 years. Another full-time worker boasts 28 years on the job, and another, 25. Durocher says that though his store can't always compete in price with today's barn-size lumber and hardware stores, those same stores can't compete with Elmwood Adams's service. According to Durocher, he and his staff are constantly upgrading their knowledge of products and techniques, and claims the store's philosophy is to give the consumer the "right part, the first time." Apparently this approach has been working pretty well; 215 years in business is nothing to sneeze at.

Elmwood Adams Hardware, 156 Main Street, Worcester, 752-1919

Best place to get stock for your wok

Twins Korean Market is filled with all sorts of Asian delicacies and staples, not just Korean, but Chinese, Japanese, Thai, Indian, and Philippino, too. Named for his twin sons, Jee Ho and Jue Ho, owner Kihong Kim's friendly shop has an assortment of fresh foods and seasonal fruits. The refrigerated cabinets tempt the taste buds with kimchee, eggrolls, and dumplings, along with a variety of frozen fish and tasty desserts. You can find shelves stacked with cans and jars of baby corn, pickled eggplant, sesame oil, Chef Chow's hot and spicy oil (a necessity), along with different Indian curries and marizushi-no-moto (fried bean curd). There are bags of dried shrimp, salted fish, and seaweed. An excellent choice of green teas and ginseng drinks is available next to the sweet and salty Korean crackers, rice cakes, cookies, and coffee-flavored chewing gum. Other shelves are crowded with a large inventory of traditional cookware, rice steamers, colorful tableware, tea sets, and even chopsticks by the dozen. Though there are other stores in town that boast similar inventories, what sets Twins apart is the restaurant next door. Too lazy to do your own cooking? Just step next door and order a freshly prepared lunch or dinner at Twins Korean Restaurant.

Twins Korean Market, 118 Cambridge Street, Worcester, 798-2547

Best downtown holdout

Downtown Worcester may be seen as a joke by many residents; after all, not even McDonald's could stay in business down there. The storefronts lining Main, Franklin, and Front streets that were once home to hundreds of prospering, specialized small businesses have given way to dollar stores. For the most part, anyway. The Owl Shop has been around since 1946, and from both inside and out, it looks it. The shop's quaint window displays, bright neon, and polished hardwoods are a welcome change from today's formica-and-florescent shopping experience. Owner John Photakis, who says his business specializes in "pleasure . . . legalized pleasure," isn't going anywhere anytime soon. Photakis says he has seen "everything change" about downtown, but adds his store remains the same "service-based, people-helping" operation it has always been. A recent noontime visit to the shop revealed a wide selection of products, ranging from cigars to music boxes and champagne, beer, and wine. Men in suits mingled with Gen-X hipsters around a central display, puffing on sweet smelling stogies. Business was thriving. More than that, people were thriving; their smiling, excited interactions recalling a different era, a different place. There was a sense of community in the Owl Shop, and with luck downtown may someday have that sense of community again.

Owl Shop, 416 Main Street, Worcester, 753-0423

Best place for a Russ Myers retrospective

Head to Highland Street's newest treasure, VideOzone, where B movies are where it's at. There will be no Jerry McGuire tonight, and you can forget about Titanic. You want a real classic? Check out Ilsa, She-Wolf of the S.S. or Beyond the Valley of the Dolls, which, besides having Roger Ebert credited as a writer, mentions good ol' Worcester. Maybe you'd prefer a little sci-fi like the underrated masterpiece Astro Zombies or Return of the Living Dead, our pick as the All-Time funniest flesh-eating flick. All the great visionaries are here -- Ed Wood, Ray Dennis Steckler, Fred Olin Ray -- the guys who put the monster back into monstrosity. VideOzone is a welcome addition for those tired of living in a Tom Cruise world.

VideOzone, 146 Highland Street Worcester, 798-9951

Best place to get nailed

Let's face it, many women are obsessed with their nails, and almost as many men are obsessed with women who are obsessed with their nails. But there's another reason so many nail salons have opened around the region. "It's a new form of relaxation -- they feel relaxed when they do nails in the salon," explains Northeast Nail Supply owner Susie Tren. "Men like to do it too. They like having their feet massaged." Born in Vietnam, Tren opened her business in the summer of 1997. "I came to Worcester from Maine. It seemed as if it had more opportunities for the future." Most of her business comes from retail outlets and nail salons, but she's open for solo fanatics as well. Does she ever benefit from her own products by visiting a salon herself? "I don't go [for a session] myself, I'm too busy. When someone sets up a new salon, I deliver. It's the only time I get to visit." Along with nail glue, powders, clippers, brushes, and implements for nail filing, her store stocks salon furniture, fingernail whirlpools, and foot spas. "Art-nail design is a growing business." Favorite colors change with the season. Brown and purple are in for fall, and there'll be lots of red for Christmas. "They want to look nice with their nails." And it's nice to see someone make it in Worcester.

Northeast Nail Supply, 15 Kelly Square, Worcester, 797-5410

Best place to go if this is blurry

In the days since Bruce Goral's dad opened Goral Opticians, a downtown institution since 1952, we've seen glasses go from being fashionable (Buddy Holly), unfashionable ("Hey dude, you're old!"), and back to fashionable (Welcome to the era of sensitive rockers!). Goral's ready to keep you looking (if not hearing) young. "We can do the thinnest, lightest, and most fashioned oval and round-shaped glasses in the latest colors; and we've got every imaginable colored contact lens available." He gets lots of requests for wild theatrical red eyes and cat eyes, too. And, should you be ready to find out how much damage listening to Black Sabbath and Kiss did to your ears, Goral offers free hearing evaluations. "Demographics say there's going to be a great amount of hearing loss caused from Walkmans, the bigger speakers, and louder concerts as opposed to in the past when it was due to industrial conditions." First warning signs? "I can equate it to a stereo. You either have strong amps and strong woofers or you have weak amps and weak woofers."

Goral Opticians, 551 Main Street, Worcester, 791-9291

Best place to stretch those salad days

The Publick House and Whistling Swan can't be wrong. Neither can Day-Kimball Hospital and J.D. Coopers. Morse Farm, a family run operation in Dudley, has been in business for 21 years, with its farmstand in Southbridge. There's the usual assortment of produce you see at other farmstands -- zucchini, apples, lettuce, potatoes -- and the less usual, like the cute little pattypan squashes. There's the collection of gourmet foods, like pasta and sauce, and homemade jellies. There's the answer to your gift-giving needs -- a custom gift basket. And a greenhouse, with chrysanthemums and flowering plants, giant pumpkins, and decorative corn. But the farm gets our undying loyalty for the cilantro -- a fragrant and indispensable herb that's not reliably found everywhere, and hardly ever really fresh. Now that the holidays are near, Morse Farm will also stock fresh turkeys from Bennett Turkey Farm, in Wilbraham, and soon enough Christmas trees. "We use a Frasier fur. It's the number one Christmas tree. It has a soft needle -- and the needle retention is excellent," says Wayne Morse, who runs the farmstand. "You'll be able to keep your Christmas tree up from Thanksgiving to April.''

Morse Farm Farmstand, 993 N. Woodstock Road (Route 169), Southbridge, 764-3392

Best place to find that book you thought you'd never need again

Sometimes, we have a way of forgetting the value of a good book, be it one that guided us through college or encouraged us to take to the streets in protest. Thankfully, most of them have ended up at Another Story, a business dedicated to getting information into the hands of people who want it. Need to refresh those writing skills? There's every edition of Strunk and White's Elements of Style. Getting ready for a vacation? There are hundreds, probably thousands of books on German, Greek, Spanish, Hebrew, and Arabic languages. It's an ultimate destination for Worcester historians or young upstarts looking for inspiration from the Radical '60s instigators Jerry Rubin, Abbie Hoffman, and Hunter S. Thompson; and for less than five bucks, you can throw a TV, film, or romance-novel trivia party -- and give the books as prizes.

Another Story Used and Rare Books, 1145 Main Street, Worcester, 752-3566

Best place to purchase Beanie Babies without being seen

Considering the number of specialty stores that previously failed to attract a collegiate clientele, it was surprising to see Norman's Beanie Babies open its doors last spring around the corner from Clark University. "When they first came out, people thought they were a toy and ripped the tag off," explains co-owner Sylvia Srebnick, who, with her husband, Norman, runs the store, which sells other collectibles and leather wallets. "That means a 50 percent mark down today, and those original ones go for thousands." Currently, there are 246 Beanies. Bears are big -- surely you've seen Valentino, Erin, Curley, Princess, Glory, and the Peace Bear (we'll hold back from suggesting the current interest on college campuses has anything to do with that silly goofy Grateful Dead bear logo). "Some of our customers buy them as gifts for their friends and some are private collectors," says Srebnick, adding the recent drop in the stock market hasn't affected the Beanie market. Financial collapse in Russia? A 20 percent drop in Japan? "I thought it was going to die, but it's been five years," Srebnick says confidently. "Some are already worth more than predicted. Trap the Mouse was predicted to be worth $1000 by the year 2004 -- it's worth $1300 to $1600 in 1998 and has exceeded all predictions." And to think you sunk your money into a 401K!

Norman's Beanie Babies and Leather Etc., 928 Main Street, Worcester, 756-1718

Best place to imagine walking the Great Wall of China

Whether you're dreaming of getting lost on the back roads of small-town America or hopping a big bird overseas, Barnes and Noble manages to get us planning more vacations than we could ever afford. You might be happy never leaving the region by visiting places suggested in The New England Berry Book, Sloan's Green Guide to Antiquing in New England, Pets Welcome, and Weekend for Two in New England: 50 Romantic Getaways, if only the US section didn't encourage you to visit every state and major city. One of our favorites: Live Nude Girls!: The Top 100 Strip Clubs in America -- now that screams family vacation. If any book (and series) inspires armchair travel, it's Houghton Mifflin's APA Insight Guides, which never fail to include some of the best travel photography. Of course, curiosity might cause you to check out Off the Beaten Path: Oklahoma, if only to find out how they filled a whole book. And, for the more adventurous, there's a whole line of maps and specialty books so you can chart your own course. Bon Voyage!

Barnes and Noble Booksellers, 470 Southbridge Street (Route 12), Auburn, 832-0855

Best place to buy more candy than you envision eating but devouring it before you give it to your date

Few people are strong enough to control themselves inside a candy showroom -- fewer yet when the candy is made right in front of you. Imagine the smell of smooth 'n melty drops, solid chocolate chunks, and fresh crackle filling your nose. That's exactly what it smells like at Prifti's Candy, Worcester's candy emporium. "There's a trend towards dark chocolate," says Nick Prifti. "It's the choice of connoisseurs. If you eat a lot, the dark seems more palatable because it's not so sweet." He finds it hard keeping truffles in stock (his favorite is Chambrourd Truffles), and if you need to get the candy to its intended recipient, get something wrapped in cellophane. "The biggest thing is boxed chocolates and some gift baskets. Just don't wait till the last minute. The past two years, we ran out of boxed chocolates on Christmas Eve." For the holidays, the four Priftis who handle the business's candy-making responsibilities work 16-hour days. And, someone always sees the lights on. "We've had to open the doors at 6:30 in the morning for people on their way to work. And we've had some of those people leave the chocolate in the car and find it melted into one big glob and we've ended up replacing it."

Prifti's Candy, 106 Green Street, Worcester, 754-5143

Best place to get framed

In an age where technology can transform even the clumsiest clicker into a great photographer, no one should pass up the opportunity to turn his or her favorite shots into a work of art. Worcester Art and Frame survived the dreaded final years of the Worcester Galleria by not only having a great store for posters and pictures, but its willingness to help the most untalented person learn how to put together a fancy looking picture frame. While some people find it easier to leave with a pre-assembled frame, others say there's a special feeling in selecting corners and edges and a cut of glass, and attempting to put them all together without damaging your picture or cracking the glass (just call it part of the learning process). Should you prefer a simpler way of doing things, the store has a wide selection of Victorian-looking frames; and if you don't even have the energy to print your own pictures, this locale will always be memorable for its endless posters of old world maps, folk art, baseball stadium paintings, Ansel Adams photographs, and Escher drawings. And those original views of the moon taken by the Apollo astronauts still look striking today -- isn't that Art Bell's face in the crater on the left?

Worcester Art and Frame, 34 Mechanic Street, Worcester, 753-8604

Best place to save that old camera<

First, before you go looking in the wrong place, this longtime Worcester business has long since left its original Pleasant Street location to make room for the glass tower at the corner of Main Street. In an age and area where most individually owned business have locked their doors and given up, Pleasant Camera has persevered in one of the city's strangest locations, just off Lincoln Square. Originally opened in 1959 by Robert Myers and Dave Suter (who sold his share a few years later), it's now owned by son Steve Myers. He's brought back our camera from the dead several times (camera repair is one of Pleasant Camera's specialties) and printed up Christmas cards spotlighting our pets. Its used equipment, most of it in the $25 to $100 range, allows potential photo-journalists the opportunity to find out what they're capable of before they find themselves with something they really don't need. Pleasant Camera -- time tested.

Pleasant Camera Repair, 31 Lincoln Street, Worcester, 752-4156

Best card carriers

Sure, most chain stores offer the same cards from outlet to outlet, but Erin's Hallmark Shop goes one step further -- it manages to transpose even the dreariest downtown day into a holiday, thanks to the guaranteed-to-raise-a-smile window displays. For more than three decades, this location has served as the one place residents can count on to fill their down-to-the-wire holiday requirements, and it always has enough party bows, streamers, balloons, and gift bags to turn any dead office into party central. Should you find yourself less than a half-hour away from public humiliation because you hadn't found a gift for that most beloved relative, you can find special gifts (stuffed animals, miniature plants, novelty picture frames), which at the very least guarantee the recipient will have a huge smile on his or her face upon unwrapping that "how thoughtful" wrapping paper. And yes, if your mom's hooked on Hallmark collectibles, Erin's got those, too!

Erin's Hallmark Shop, 338 Main Street, Worcester, 755-1004

Best place to purchase Worcester clothing

Ever since Worcester got its own professional hockey team in 1994, IceCats clothing, offered at Worcester IceCats Team Store, has been the main choice of locals. This season, in addition to their usual ever-changing selection, the team are celebrating their fifth season with special items commemorating the anniversary. For those of you looking for non-sports Worcester clothing, longtime landmark Olympic Trophy sells lots of shirts to visiting business people looking for something to bring back to their kids and residents planning to visit their families back in their hometowns. Since the main part of Olympic's business is custom shirts, it has a cool display of shirts it's printed, including "Jose A. Rivera: Worcester's Own," "Earthtones: The Thorndyke Road School Environmental Chorus," "Chen Du," "Spag's Good as Gold Coffee," Union Station Alliance's "I Helped Save Union Station," and the Nigerian 1994 World Cup team. Want your own? Give 'em a call.

Worcester IceCats Team Store, 303 Main Street, Worcester, 798-5400

Olympic Trophy, 204 Main Street, Worcester, 754-3293

Best place to have a one-day art career

Okay. You spend your work week drowning in a sea of numbers, dodging software crashes, vainly attempting to get some work done between interruptions. But no matter how productive the paper shuffling, that's still what it is. So you wake up on Saturday morning and think, "What did I achieve this week?" Remember the days when all you had to do for that sense of accomplishment was dig into a jar of paste, smear it on some construction paper, add a few accents with some Crayolas and voilà! you had a gorgeous work of art to take home to mom? Well, C.C. Lowell can return you to that state of instant creative bliss. While the store sells a complete line of art supplies -- oil paints, sketch pads, easels, etc. -- it also offers a variety of do-it-yourself craft kits, including papermaking, greeting cards, feltmaking, origami, jewelry, tie dye, and clay sculpture, all completely self-contained so you can make your purchase and begin your art career pronto.

C.C. Lowell, 258 Park Avenue, Worcester, 757-7113

Best place to buy a gift for your boa constrictor or grandmother

If you can make it past the iguanas (some as large as baseball bats) clambering in the front window as you scoot into Reptiles and Beyond, then you've made it inside a warm and redolent refuge for nearly any creature that's scaly, cold blooded, or six-legged. "Most of our customers are high school- and college-age guys. But we have a surprisingly large number of elderly women who keep iguanas," says store manager Lisa Lebel, who adds that boa constrictors and pythons range from $80 to $400. The store also sells scorpions and at least seven kinds of tarantulas. "Our bestselling items are crickets and the bearded dragons [an iguana with a skin flap hanging down]," says Lebel, who recommends "frozen food" when feeding your pet. "Frozen rats can't bite back.'' But she cautions, for those considering purchasing a gift, "It's not a good idea to give anyone a snake as a gift. Unless you know them really well."

Reptiles and Beyond, 809 Southbridge Street (Route 20), Auburn, 832-5113

Best place for newspapers and magazines

Before the advent of the Internet and its billion of Web sites, cable, and satellite TV, it was the pictures in glossy magazines filled with stories of cities much more exciting than yours that took you far away. We think magazines still rule. And no one has a bigger selection than Borders. Want to check out the latest fashions? There are Vogue America, British Vogue, Paris Vogue, and Vogue Bambini for School Children. Music mags from around the planet. There are enough art and design magazines to make you feel like you've traveled the world. Involved in the parenting thing? Selections run from American Cheerleader to Radical Teacher. International papers like Italy's Gazzeta Della Sport, the Japan Times, and Germany's Die Zeit sit alongside newspapers from most of the country's major cities, from the Honolulu Star-Bulletin and Little Rock Democrat Gazette to the Minneapolis Star Tribune.

Borders, 476 Boston Turnpike Road (Route 9), Shrewsbury, 845-8665

Best place to put on a united front

If you grew up in Worcester and played any level of sports, you've most likely been introduced to Charlie's Surplus and Athletic Equipment. In the days before brand-name sneakers ruled the world, all you needed was a few bucks and you could pick up enough pairs of Converse All Stars to make it through the season. Who knows how many hours were spent trying to figure out where the defect was on the "seconds." This is still the place to go if you want footwear and clothing that'll last. If you want to start your own team (or your office, or fraternity's revving up for a charity weekend tournament), this is the place to get your name on a shirt. Charlie's has expanded its line in recent years, providing "camouflage for the entire family" and Dr. Marten's boots. See -- it's the coolest place in town for two feet! And we'll still take a pair of Converse when we're battling the hot summer courts.

Charlie's Surplus and Athletic Equipment, 116 Water Street, Worcester, 752-7121

Best place to prepare for the one that gets away

When we think of fishing, most of us remember little more than a coffee container filled with worms and a rod that broke after the fifth cast. We don't remember the ritual of the sport -- how the right line, sinker, and bait could catch us the best meal we've had. We forget about the long, wonderful afternoons out on the water, waiting for a bite. And by the time we graduate from high school, we forget fishing ever existed. "Nothing between the ages of 18 and 22" is how Lower Forty Fishing Outfitters' owner Jim Bender describes his clientele. "Most are in the 40-plus range after they've established their careers and have a little more time on their hands." Hey -- why wait? After a view of Lefty Kreb's Salt Water Fly Tying video, you'll be ready, after you pick out the proper graphite or bamboo flyrod. The clothing could make for some pretty "fly" fashions -- especially the breathable jacket and rain gear, although the suspender-held waders might be stretching it a bit. Fishing caps always go in and out of fashion, and if you need more proof of this place's coolness, there's an autographed Sage poster that reads, "To Jim - a great fly fishing brother, Larry Bird." See -- the early bird really does get . . . hooked. (Sorry!) Sign up for classes, which are held throughout the winter, and for the Schoolie School for Introduction to Fly Fishing once the weather gets warm.

Lower Forty Fishing Outfitters, 134 Madison Street, Worcester, 752-4004

Best Worcester experience

Everyone knows the people of Worcester love a bargain. They also love holding onto the past, so when the Fair Closeouts and More opened up with the name of the now-defunct local chain (by the relatives of the original owners), we were in heaven. With its outside wall advertising "Four Generations in Business" and "We Know How to Take Care of Our Customers," the emphasis is certainly on "Our." For the city that hosts the Summer Nationals, there's large classic-car and auto-racing murals. In a town that's old and dusty, cleaning supplies, which sometimes make you think they had been at the original Fair on Route 20. There are stuffed animals and trolls galore. There's an incredible assortment of cassettes and CDs (most only a $1), including a Rad Rocks collection (you don't want to know); and if there is really an '80s revival going on, there are plenty of Marc Almond, Del-Lords, and Teardrop Explodes recordings. And what would Worcester be without your neighbor fixing his car on a Sunday morning? Send 'em here for automobile supplies, as well as pet supplies, plumbing supplies, laundry supplies. Surely you don't need everything at the Fair, but you can't live without it, can you?

The Fair Closeouts and More, 114 Southbridge Street, Worcester, 799-3770

Best smoke shop

We have stoked, toked, snipped, and clipped innumerable stogies at some of the most celebrated smoking establishments in the state, but none has warmed our hearts more than the welcoming aura and titillating tobbaciana of the Highland Emporium. Upon entering, even the novice aficionado is engulfed with the kindness of a more-than-willing-to-assist staff. They care about your business and treat you with respect, always calling attention to new offerings. The humidor's shelves are stocked with leaf from A. Fuente to Zino. Many a night we've basked in the smoking rooms, pondering the essence of life, mingled with a touch of Dominican smoke, or Honduran, Mexican, or Nicaraguan, depending upon our mood. It's a warm sanctuary for all and serves as a welcome alternative for people who don't want to wind down at a noisy bar. It's a place for good conversation with the other patrons, sharing stories of the day, or to relax in its leather chairs, watching television, listening to CDs, or playing a game of chess while enjoying a free cup of coffee. Once a month, usually on a Friday night, the staff holds a theme night where attendees dress up in the spirit of the theme. There's been a blues night and a Jimmy Buffet "Parrothead" night. And just like on Cheers, after a few visits, everyone knows your name

Highland Emporium Smoking Parlor, 146 Highland Street, Worcester, 756-1989

Best place to get pro-am rigs to click your pix<

Founded in 1895, L. B. Wheaton Inc. Photographic Supplies not only has those little cardboard throwaway cameras but carries a full range of darkroom supplies from C41 color-processing chemicals to red or orange safelights. It offers everything from neckstraps to lens caps, and always has an assortment of new and good quality used 35mm cameras as well as 4x5s. It features spotmeters, light meters, tripods, telescopes, and binoculars. Owner Steve Pond will make up special-order wedding albums and do digital printing from your CD or floppy disk. You can find a large selection of picture frames as well as the latest informative books for the beginning photographer to advanced tomes for the pro.

L. B. Wheaton Inc. Photographic Supplies, 259 Park Avenue, Worcester, 791-3308

Best place to get good art supplies cheap

Of all the places you might think to go to for art supplies, the Olde Schoolhouse at Spag's should top your list for name-brand stuff cheap. There is only an aisle and a half devoted to art materials, but what an array. Windsor & Newton oil paints in 6.75 ounce tubes for only $6.99. Cotman watercolors in tubes for $1.99 each. Quality Strathmore sketchbooks from $3.29 for a 9x12 book to 18x24 watercolor pads for a mere $9.99. And 50-sheet newsprint pads for just $3.99. Although the selection of brushes is not top of the line, they stock real Chung King hog bristle brushes for oils and acrylics, and white sable synthetic scrollers, shaders, and fans. There is a wide choice of pre-stretched and gessoed canvas, and more colors of Sculpey than you'd ever need. Spag's even has those classic string-tie portfolios so that you can cart around your finished work. The most expensive item in stock is a hand assembled wooden easel box with compartments and a removable palette, for only $36.99. And Spag's got bags!

Spag's, 193 Boston Turnpike, in Shrewsbury, 788-2570

Best mall carpeting

Many of you may remember the excitement when the former Galleria Mall was transformed into central Massachusetts' premier fashion outlet center, the Worcester Common Outlet Mall. You may remember the ads and the billboards featuring semi-celebrity Judith Light (Angela from TV's Who's the Boss). You may also remember the excitement of a major draw to Worcester's downtown, and the reviews in the media that spoke glowingly of . . . the carpeting. It sounds strange, but the carpeting is a feature not found in most malls. It's everywhere in the this one, easing your tired feet, and urging you on to the end-of-the-season bargains. It's a Zen-like experience perusing the upscale clothing stores surrounded by acres of colorful carpeting. If you've got mall burnout, treat yourself to some restful shopping and visit the Worcester Common Fashion Outlet Mall.

Worcester Common Outlet Mall, 110 Front Street, Worcester, 798-2581

Best used threads

If we were a sheltered college freshmen with nothing in our closets but Dockers, the first place we'd head to is Easy Pieces, Worcester's trendiest used clothing and whatever store. What's whatever, you ask? There are Dr. Marten's boots (they do a brisk trade in the used variety), flapper dresses, hats from hell, and jeans of every size and shape, all served with pumped-up bass and pierced flesh. Subtle is a word not spoken above a whisper here. Why wear retro '70s clothes from the mall when the real deal is right in front of you for a few measly bucks? Or if you prefer the down- and-in look, jump right into someone else's used corduroy pants. It's amazing what a little leather and hair coloring will do for your image. Everything here is designed to be noticed, and the result is sensory overload at first. Have some patience and dig through the maze of color for that unique article of clothing that'll make your parents want to rush you back home.

Easy Pieces, 4 Quinsigamond Avenue, Worcester, 791-7533

Best alternative to the witness relocation progra

Look, we don't know what you've done to warrant moving far away and changing your name, but at the Halloween Outlet you're well on your way to a new you. There are fake hair, hundreds of wigs, facial putty, movie and theatrical makeup, and Monica masks if that's who you'd rather be. If you want to blend into a crowd of zombies, the store has that covered, too. In fact, it can supply or order just about any costume you dream up. There are gruesome scenes in the corners, shrunken heads hanging from the ceiling, and thousands of adult costumes in the back room. The Halloween Outlet's catalogue goes out all over the country. (The store supplies much of what you see in the Halloween fundraising haunted houses.) And dig the company car -- a hearse, black, with its logo in screaming colors on the side. Pay a visit, turn yourself into somebody else, and trust no one.

Halloween Outlet, 246 Park Avenue, Worcester, 798-9957

Best place to stock up on software, duct tape, and fish food

Building 19 in Worcester is either a shopper's heaven or hell, depending on your point of view. Inside this huge warehouse are the good, the bad, and the items that defy description. The merchandise changes daily, so if you don't buy it then and there, chances are it's gone in a week. You can get most anything you'll find in department stores, but you'll pay far less. Advertising flyers -- which spell out in precise detail how the merchandise came to be sold there: floods, fires, and overstocks -- are as entertaining as their stores are and are accompanied by simple but fun cartoons. This is the last stop in the retail food chain, and you can benefit. There's software for a quarter of the price, rugs, couches, coffee-table books, coffee tables, long coats, last year's Easter candy, and hardware. If you need it, you'll either find it or you won't. But you'll have a blast looking.

Building 19, 893 Grafton Street, Worcester, 791-0190

Best place to buy a used Beatle

Highland Street's Al-Bum's is a must see for anyone who enjoys music. Inside a cramped store, thousands of CDs, both new and used, as well as cassette tapes, posters, and vinyl are squeezed in. You'll also find 12" singles, T-shirts, and imported CDs. It's all here, the greats and the not-so-greats of music, and the used prices are less than half what you'd pay for new. Rare and imported music fans will find gold if they pan the river long enough: the Jethro Tull section was all imports from Scandinavian countries! Some of the albums are as ratty as your uncle's Zeppelin collection, but they're so affordable you could buy a dozen and tape them on cassette. The store also buys back your used CDs so you can take a chance on a used CD and sell it back if it sucks. That's what we call easy listening.

Al-Bum's, 149 Highland Street, Worcester, 798-3657

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