Dating games

Part 2

by Amy Beaudry

For these students who want to play the field, secrecy is definitely an issue. The "don't tell" policy is especially true for students who live on campus. Moran says they tell their dates "only come over between this time and this time." Then they try to sneak their dates up to their dorm rooms so no one will know they are involved.

Moran has seen some of these casual dates end in disaster. She knew of one couple who went out once: the girl thought the date would lead to something more permanent so she bought the guy a pair of $400 sneakers. The guy, however, did not want to be seriously involved.

Jeff Caputo, a Worcester State College senior, has also known people who jumped to the conclusion that a few dates equals a serious commitment. "It's a lot harder to stay with one person because you always find someone new that intrigues you," he says. Caputo considers college to be a transitional stage, a time to discover what you are looking for and what types of people are out there. "It's a lot more fun to date now than in high school," Caputo says. "In class you get to meet more people and get to know [their] backgrounds."

Erica Machut, a 1997 Holy Cross graduate, says students from her school hang out in bars close to campus, such as the White Eagle. Although she was more inclined to go out to dinner and the movies, Machut occasionally went to bars because of the limited entertainment possibilities in Worcester. There's "not a lot to do" and "no place to go," Machut says of Worcester.

Holy Cross tries to create social activities where students can mingle, such as dances and formals, but even with these opportunities to meet other Holy Cross students, Machut says, it's a well-acknowledged fact that "people [on the Holy Cross campus] don't really date." She says it's not uncommon for a Holy Cross student to go a few months, or even all four years, without a single date.

"[There's] no such thing as going out on a date," she says.

More often than not, when students do date, they stick to students at their own school. "Dating outside of school doesn't happen much," Machut says. Even though they live on the same campus, sometimes these students cheat on each other. "News traveled quickly; they can't get away with it, but that didn't stop people from doing it," Machut says.

A brief fling on Saturday and then back to the books on Monday. Because of these prospects, Machut says, "Nearly all [my] friends are frustrated with dating in Worcester and at Holy Cross."

Karen Osman, a Worcester Polytechnic Institute junior, frequently asks her sorority sisters, "Where are the good guys?" Her friends tells her you can meet people in bars, but for Osman, who is under 21, this is not yet an option.

Osman's last two invitations for dates arrived via e-mail. They were from guys who attend WPI and noticed her on campus. The first e-mailer saw Osman in an organic-chemistry class, but waited a year to contact her. Though she met him for coffee, they did not date again. Osman is now reluctant to respond to e-mailer number two.

She does know one couple who met during freshmen orientation -- their first day on campus three years ago -- and are still together. Osman says there is a number of orientation leaders who go on dates with their "orientees." In fact, she says, male orientation leaders often joke about scoping out the incoming class for "fresh meat": freshmen women.

Students also search for fresh blood at parties hosted by WPI fraternity houses. Osman says that on the weekends a lot of single students attend WPI bashes, or as she calls them, "home to a lot of party hook-ups." If you go to one of these parties, "don't even think about a relationship," Osman says. They are only "one night of fun."

Part 3